Before Criticizing

     I have a tendency to be rather self-critical. This can be both bad and good. The bad is that a self-critical person will occasionally beat his or her self up over things they absolutely cannot control. The good is that developing a critical eye toward self helps to ensure that one continues “walking in a manner worthy of the calling to which you have been called.” (Ephesians 4:1)

     It is very easy for the naturally self-critical to begin viewing everyone, including (especially) brethren, through a very critical lens. If one is not careful they can find themselves offering more criticism than encouragement, more criticizing than edifying. I fully understand that criticism and rebuke is necessary at times (2 Timothy 4:1-2). I also fully understand that the motive behind any criticism I offer must be correct or I am guilty of sin. Thus, I have worked very hard to train myself to ask a few questions before I criticize. Perhaps you will find these questions and the points that follow helpful.

     Does my criticism come from jealousy or envy? These are such ugly traits for Christians to possess. Pilate was sharp enough to recognize that Jesus stood before him because certain ones were envious of Him (Mark 15:10). I have heard fellow preachers lambast a brother behind his back, picking at just about anything they could think to pick at, and for the life of me could not find any reason for them to do it besides envying his talents, number of published articles, and impressive meeting schedule. When I open my mouth to begin criticizing a brother or sister in Christ I had best pause and make sure something besides the “wisdom” of demonic jealousy (James 3:14-15) is motivating me. If not, I need to bite my tongue and get busy making some very important heart corrections.

     Does my criticism come merely from a difference in opinion? Sometimes it’s difficult to remember that opinion (something God does not condemn one way or the other) is not to be made a test of fellowship or a cause for stumbling. I encourage you to take a few minutes to read the entirety of Romans 14 before continuing. Nothing must be made a test of fellowship that is not a test of salvation. To become critical of someone over nothing more than matters of opinion is to elevate an issue that has no business being elevated. Those who are called upon to do nothing from rivalry or conceit, to be humble enough to count others as more significant than themselves, and to focus more upon the interests of others than themselves (Philippians 2:3-4) simply have no business criticizing one another over a difference of opinion for genuine love does not insist on its own way (1 Corinthians 13:5). When I open my mouth to criticize I must ask myself if something more worthy than a desire for my personal opinion to be accepted is motivating me. If not, I need to bite my tongue and turn my focus inwardly to fix what needs fixing.

     Does my criticism come merely from a difference in style? Many times a preacher or Bible class teacher will say something that I would have said differently. Many times they present God’s Word in a style that differs from mine. So what? If they have not taught error, have made God’s Word understandable, and have comported themselves as men of God than our difference in style is simply that. Just because I might have said a thing differently or used a different passage does not mean the expression or passage they used was wrong. Different styles are equally valid when the same truth is being taught. I make it a practice not to pull a new preacher or Bible class teacher aside to tell him “I would have said it differently.” If the way he said it was clear and the truth was taught than a difference in style usually isn’t important enough to mention. There will be exceptions to this, particularly if he asks for input, but let us bear in mind that a difference in style is usually not a good reason for becoming critical.

     Does my criticism come from a desire to bring this person down or hurt them in some way? Sometimes people are cruel to us and there is a desire on our part to strike back at them. When we’ve been hurt and our emotions have been incited it is sometimes difficult for us to remember the example of Jesus as described by Peter in 1 Peter 2:21-23. He did not repay reviling for reviling, trade wound for wound, or seek to get even. He continued entrusting Himself to Him who judges justly. The Father says vengeance belongs to Him and He will be the one to repay (Hebrews 10:30). Vengeance and retribution are not mine to seek and if they are motivating my criticism I must bite my tongue and remember my place.

     As I mentioned at the beginning of this article, there are times when criticism is not only valid but also necessary. However, the motive behind my giving it is paramount to my own spiritual health. If my motives for criticizing are wrong, even if my words are right, than I have sinned and am in need or repentance (Philippians 1:15). In a society as critical as this one, let us beware lest we become critical people whose hearts make valid criticism impossible.